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 Act 1 Scene 4 Hallucinogenic Fish

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Act 1 Scene 4 Hallucinogenic Fish Empty
PostSubject: Act 1 Scene 4 Hallucinogenic Fish   Act 1 Scene 4 Hallucinogenic Fish I_icon_minitimeThu Feb 12, 2015 4:29 pm

Crew and Steve’s Brick lane council flat. The TV is switched on.
Newscaster: This evening’s top story again. Popstar Player Attitude, Naomi Spence is feared missing.
Crew: How long did Doc say he would take to get round here?
Steve: ‘Bout 20 minutes. Taking notice of the TV news Hang  on what’s all this?
Crew: Who cares, it’s the s’nooze! When did you phone him?
Steve: ’Bout 20 minutes ago.  That’s some weird stuff, first that pop promoter disappears, a week later, someone half inches Platitude.
Crew: Aliens?
Steve: Not enough data, instinctively I’m against the idea though.
Newscaster: Miss Spence was reported missing immediately after her concert on Tuesday which was the last of three sold out dates at London’s O No arena. Fears were raised when Ms Spence did not return onstage for an anticipated encore. Her manager found the star gone from her dressing room leaving personal possessions and items of clothing behind. There was no sign of a struggle although three suited gentlemen were seen in the vicinity of the backstage area and are the police are presently requesting that anyone with information about the three gentlemen come forward as they are wanted for questioning  in connection with the star’s disappearance.
Steve: Negative on the extraterrestrial hypothesis:  Aliens don’t wear suits.
Crew: How do you know aliens don’t wear suits? Have you seen one?
Steve: Of course!
Crew: Really? You’ve seen an alien?
Steve: No, a suit, I’ve seen a suit. Aliens don’t wear them, politicians and office workers do.
Crew: But what if it was an alien in disguise?
Steve: A fancy dress alien?
Crew: What if the alien was using a chameleon field to blend in? You can dress people up to look like aliens in movies so how hard would it be to dress an alien up as a human?
Steve: Why are you so obsessed about aliens?  You ought to watch something that isn’t the Aliens Channel for a change, you’re head’s full of it, there’s no room for anything sensible in there. Just an endless dodgy sci-fi movie.
Crew: What’s wrong with the aliens channel? Aliens built the pyramid! FACT. Aliens had electrical power transformer engraved on their Egyptians temple walls FACT. There are  speeders and helicopters on the Egyptians temple walls temples FACT. There are actual GREY ALIENS on the Egyptian temple walls Fact.
Steve: Are you done now with those Egyptians temple walls? Ok First, we know a fair bit about ancient Egypt because of the discovery of the Rosetta stone which allowed us to translate the hieroglyphs for the first time First: aliens didn’t built the pyramid, people did, there’s something called the Famine Stele which gives instructions on how to build a pyramid and what stones to use. What you refer to as an ‘electrical power transformer’  is what is called a Djed pillar.  Second: it's not a power transformer. It's literally a PILLAR. A PILLAR which has multiple capitals as a SYMBOL of absolute strength and support. It became a symbol of the pharaoh himself. The Pharaoh was the strength and support of the nation. Just as a PILLAR supports the roof of a building, the Pharaoh supported Egypt itself. If you look at the image in question you will see ARMS coming out of the top. Clever huh?   Third: There are no speeders and helicopters represented on the walls of Abydos. These are all common symbols in the Pharaoh's cartouche, a bow, a hand and an arm, which have been defaced damaged and decayed and had other images superimposed over them to modify the Pharaoh’s historical standing,  until they look a bit like helicopters speeders etc. Only someone TOTALLY UNFAMILIAR with hieroglyphs from this period would make the mistake. And finally there is no GREY ALIEN represented in hieroglyphs. It is a lotus flower in a vase. So the idea that aliens abducted Platitude is all a load of bollo interrupted by their attention being drawn to the news
Newsreader: .....that Naomi Spence was abducted by aliens.  Fans have inundated the messaging site Tosser with a series of bizarre theories regarding the star’s disappearance, citing the Miss Spence’s recent pronouncements about her belief in alien visitors and that she communicates with them on a regular basis. Her manager was not available to comment.
Crew and Steve turn to look at each other.
Crew: Synchronicity, that’s spooky, it must be the quickening!  I’m going to toss off a message, pass me my laptop.
There’s a knock at the door. Steve gets up to let in Doc, their drug dealer.
Doc: Guys, I’ve got this crazy new-shit. You won’t believe this stuff.
Steve:  Crew will, he’ll believe anything.
Doc: Huh?
Crew: We were talking about aliens abducting Platitude.
Steve: No, you were talking about aliens abducting Platitude. I was telling you it was boll..
Crew Interrupting: Then suddenly on the news they say that aliens abducted Platitude.
Steve: Dude! They said no such thing! They said a load of mad-heads on Tosser were spamming her account with talk about aliens. Mad Heads! Just like you, foaming at the mouth with an auto-think reflex  that it was ‘aliens’ whenever confronted by a mystery they don’t know the answer to.
Crew: What do you think happened to Platitude?
Doc: If you don’t mind, I try to keep out of politics. Listen, this stuff here, it’s not the usual stuff, it’s something else, something weird and new. It might be able to shed light on a few things, but I make no promises. I haven’t tested it enough yet.
Steve: What are you talking about?
Doc: This stuff I’ve developed, it has special psychedelic properties, at least, it does to me.
Steve: Dude, you’re so wired a cream-cake would get you high. As long as it’s as good as the stuff we had last month, that was awesome.
Doc: It’s a whole ‘nother level and I don’t say this lightly. Alright guys, I’ve got my rounds to do, I’ll be seeing you. Before I go I’ll say this, you’ve got my number, if things get too heavy and you can’t handle it, I can be round in half an hour. Don’t worry, it’s just in case. Ok boys? Toodle-loo!
Steve: Well that fills me with confidence!  Just what the hell are we gonna be smoking here?
Crew: Go on then skin one up!
Steve: Nah, I’m feeling a bit nervous.
Crew: Giz it here I’ll do it softballs.
Crew rolls a herbal cigarette and smokes. After a few minutes his eyes become wide.
Crew: What’s that noise?
Steve: Huh? I dunno. Did you slip one out without noticing?
Crew: Shhh! I can hear something!
Steve and Crew are quiet and listen attentively.. They hear a gentle tap tap tap which increases becomes louder. There’s suddenly a knock on the door. Crew screams.
Steve: It’s the Doc you toffy-apple.
Doc: Sorry gentlemen, I left behind my stash. What was that noise?
Steve looks at Crew.
Steve: Just this peanut getting jumpy over nothing.
Doc: I can see you’ve sparked one up. Have a good trip, remember you’ve got my number!
Doc leaves the two men looking at each other. Crew is mournful and Steve contemptuous.
Steve: Gimee that spliff nuggins!
The two proceed to smoke the joint for a couple of minutes, passing it back and forth.
Gradually, as they continue to smoke, their eyes slowly stop shifting their gaze around the room  focus on one particular spot across the room. They are both now looking at something about 3 feet away from them that also appears to be looking straight at them.
Steve: Crew?
Crew: Uhuh?
Steve: What the fuck is that?
Crew:  I don’t know Steve.
What they are both looking at, and what has materialised in front of them is a 6 foot tall figure in a robe.
Steve: cautiously: I thought you were the authority about this stuff.
Crew: How should I know what it is.
The figure looks at them through its hood, seems to do a double take that they can see it, and promptly vanishes.
Steve: What was all that about? Maybe that was what the Doc was warning us must be the weed, but how? My head hurts, explain it to me please Crew.
Crew: Well, let me see, it appeared humanoid shape, around six foot tall. So it can’t be a giant.
Steve: A giant?
Crew: They’re mentioned in the Bible, but they were all killed. It appeared to be alive, so it can’t be one. The way it moved, seemed organic, so we can discount a robot invasion, unless it’s a really well designed robot.
Steve: A robot in disguise?
Crew: Doubt it. Its reaction to us seeing it tells me it was organic. It could be a reptilian, but it seemed a bit short for a reptilian, those things are supposed to be up to 12 foot tall.
Steve: Could be a baby Reptilian!
Crew: It could be father Christmas if we’re going to stand on our heads and talk out of our bums. Hmmm, Could be a Nordic I suppose, we won’t know until we get to see it properly. But if this being starts yammering on about ‘how humanity is damaging the environment’ and how we ‘must work towards world peace’ then we’ll know it’s a Nordic space-brother from the Pleiades.   Now, how is it possible that we can suddenly see discarnate beings. How is that possible? The weed must have special, entheogenic properties. Mysterious figures.Hmm....Cannabis Sativa... salvinorin. Terpenoids?
Steve:  Terpenoids! What planet are they from?
Crew: No they’re not aliens, chemicals, organic chemicals,  many are present on cannabis but in low concentrations. If perhaps a strain has been developed with a higher content of active  terpenoids it’s possible that we may experience hallucinations more like Salvia Divinorum.
Steve:  But was it an hallucination? We both saw it!
Crew: Yeah, it’s weird. I’m already trying to rationalise it away. Well we’ve got a quarter of this stuff to experiment on. We’ll have to conduct further scientific trials. We’re going to be systematic, empirical and logical. And we’re going to get really really high. Y’know I’ve done some research into Sarpa salpa.
Steve: What’s that, an alien star system? A dodgy weed chemical? I just don’t know anymore.
Crew:An hallucinogenic fish!
Steve:  Of course! How could it not be! An hallucinogenic fish, I’m kicking myself.  That’s just what I was going to say.
Crew: Pondering . A type of bream  was recreationally eaten in Roman times. It would lead to frightening visions which lasted for several days. In fact it wasn’t the fish itself which contained the psychoactive alkaline compound which produced the visions, it was a particular type of algae which the fish ate which has psychoactive  properties.  This fish when ingested gave terrifying visions of demonic beings. There have been various psychoactive alkaline compounds used throughout history and occasionally some people have reported seeing beings of one sort or another.  Perhaps we’re experiencing a similar sort of shamanic episode.
Steve: It already seems more like a psychotic one. How do you know all this? Most of the time you just talk rubbish!
Crew: Drugs are my life dude.
Steve: I’m impressed.
Crew: And aliens of course.
Steve: Less impressed. But what we’ve just seen, maybe you’re right..... What a depressing thought!
Crew: I say we hit up a bong with this stuff, make a few reserve spliffs and hit the streets and see what happens.

Steve: That my friend sounds like a legendarily bad  idea and a potentially very grave error of judgement. Let’s do it!

Crew: Exactly. The real nightmares are on TV indicating the telly on that ‘orrible thing. All those poor old people trapped in their homes with that thing terrorising them all day, and their only place of safety is a few hours in the afternoon when the antiques programmes are on.  Then the stifled horror of the daily news explodes into their room at 5pm like a carefully packed incendiary device  designed to do maximum damage. In comparison the real world isn’t half as bad. Let’s get steamed and check it all out and see if we see anything weird.
Steve: Yeah. It’s our flat that’s weird I reckon. Let’s get out of here. Take some air.  A brisk constitutional stroll throughout the streets of merrie old London town. What could be better?

Crew: As high as helium dogs.

Steve: Higher than that even. Yeah! Let’s get rolling buddy.

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